Nature and Nurture
“I’m bonded with the natural world. And I think this is my role, to enjoy that bond while sharing it with others.”
Ella Sorensen, Manager of a bird sanctuary in Utah, in an article posted by the Audubon Society on Facebook.
Facebook is crummy in so many ways, but I stay. I spend less and less time there and that’s a good thing. One of a dwindling number of reasons I stay is every now and then I see a post that strikes a chord, deep in my heart. Like the one about this wonderful woman who’s made it her life to work at a wetlands bird sanctuary, and talk to people about it. I thought of how I feel when I walk in the park, at Los Gatos Creek and Vasona Lake. How I love to watch the birds, and look up at the trees, to take pictures and share them. Pictures from my walks are my most well-liked posts on Facebook, now I think on it. Maybe that should be my thing, the only thing I post on Facebook, pictures from my walks.
“My purpose is to nurture myself, and my imagination.”
Purpose statement given to me by coach Amy Buck
I didn’t take it in at first, when the coach gave me the statement. She assigned purpose statements to each of us in a small group after guiding us through some journaling exercises and shared reading aloud. It seemed like one of those all purpose messages — like a horoscope — that could be given to anyone. But two words stayed with me, my thoughts would return to them again and again — the words “nurture” and “imagination.”
The words became a touchstone for me, a point of reference in decision-making. Not momentous or weighty decisions, but mundane day-to-day decisions. Should I pour another glass of wine? Go for a walk? Listen to the news? Eat a bowl of tortilla chips? I started to ask myself a follow-up question, Will this nurture me? Not, Do I want this? but, Will this nurture me? And something shifted inside. I began to choose differently.
No, I won’t have another glass of wine, because I might want it, but it won’t do me good. I’ll try a cup of tea, take comfort in its fragrance and warmth.
Yes, I’ll go for a walk, even though I feel lazy, because I know it will clear my head, lift my spirits, and help me relax. Staring at my laptop, binge-streaming TV dramas, will not.
Will it nurture my imagination, to listen to another political news podcast while I wash the dishes? No, I’ll listen to LeVar Burton read a short story instead. Maybe later, when I’m back at my laptop, instead of streaming trash TV I’ll find music to listen to while I write a piece for my class with Linda Schreyer.
Do I always make the best choice? No, not every time, but more often than not. Over time, I trended in a healthier direction. I began thinking of these choices as caring for myself, not denying myself. Not depriving myself of what I want, but being good to myself, giving myself what I need. Nurturing myself. I came to see it as necessary and important — gradually it became second nature — to nurture myself. Because if I don’t nurture myself, how will I be nurtured? How will I nurture my children? I deserve to be nurtured, don’t I? Don’t they? Yes. Yes, of course, yes.
Today I plan to go for a walk, and my son’s agreed to go with me. We need to drop in at a lab, for preoperative blood tests for his upcoming surgery. I told him, the park near the lab has ponds and a creek, and is one of my favorite places to walk. I suggested we could go for a walk there first, then go to the lab, and he said yes. Maybe the baby geese and ducks have hatched. We can take pictures.
